The Rising

I had travelled afar,

Slept under many a star

Through mountains, dungeons and caves,

Freeing dozens of tortured slaves

A true harbinger of peace,

Over all I shall have ruled with ease

In many a battle I had slaughtered and maimed,

For my just brutality over hills I am famed

All who would anger and oppose me,

By the tip of my blade would be set free

Such was my repertoire beyond countless days and starry nights,

Famed as a god I was, fabled and mythical were all my fights

But, today in this world of netherworldly rainbowed colours,

My soul paces with unease, twitching with feral fervours

For what I found in this world upon my arriving,

Intense and surreal was the rising

Advertisements

A View From Within

Look at how we bleed,

Killing each other to secure

Our place

In a world of

Make believe

Vacuum Living

Pointless

Futile

Vain

Insane

Fragile

Frail

Sorrow

Prevails

Empty, vacant

Soulless shell

Very much alive

In this deep wicked hell

Projected Life

Covet your oh-so-precious moments
While running away from your laments

Become the thing you see around you
While forsaking your true self & view

Undo all the wrongs you’ve done
While victimizing yourself to fun

Dull your mind as you keep sucking up
While hiding all that you keep fucking up

Poor little lost piece of shit
Are you at peace being a fit?

The turmoil and congestion in your unused mind
Let’s you keep yourself away from the sacred find

All for the sake of pleasant and good memories
All for the sake of story-telling & vague summaries

All for the sake of living your one life to the fullest
All for the sake of running away from the purest

A burn wound for your clit from your fav humping pillow
Keep tossing your mind out in the name of Y.O.L.O

Constantly let down by those who say they care
Always on my own in all my times of despair

I think I have a drinking problem now
Depression divine – Ha-Ha. LoL. LoL. LoL.

I keep building my fences higher and higher

Just A Joke

Did you know him?
Who?Him?

Yes!Him!I didn’t know him!
Oh,really?I didn’t know him as well!

As well as what?
What was in his life’s well?

Well, who knows?
Did you know him?

Me?No!Never took the time actually!
Oh,how sad!What about you?

Any clue who he was?
Nope!Just another nameless soul to me!

Hmm mm
How sad!

Doesn’t anybody know him?
Me?No!Who me?No!

Well,it looks he was in an invisible cloak!
Trying to fit in with us??
Wasn’t he just a joke!

Or was he?

Longing

Where is this fabled lifelong friend of mine?
Yet to be met and found to be forever thine

I look around me everywhere and see everyone
Has someone they are close to that it seems so fun

Best friends, close friends, a maze of a friend circle
None of which I’ve gained with my life’s sparkle

Unacknowledged, forever twisted and alone
Have I forgotten an old sin that I must atone?

To be with a companion
Who is with you till the end
In someone’s eyes to be a champion
I painfully long for a lifelong friend

Maybe I am destined to be left behind eternally
To have hope given and taken away from me endlessly

With a worn and heavy heart in abandon
I long for a lifelong constant companion

Where is this fabled lifelong friend of mine?
Yet to be met and found to be forever thine

Will I Ever?

Will I ever truly go
To the far East to grow?

In mind, in body, in spirit
I wish to nullify this life’s defecit

Living with a silent scorn
All efforts vain and torn

Endless ridiculing
Suffocation stifling

Oh my illuminary friend
Please help me see this end

Will I ever truly go
To the far East to grow?

Stagnating within a stagnant pause

Circus of Realms

Hey! You there with the mask & cloak! You right there!
I see you’re going somewhere, may I ask you where?

To a goal fueled by ambition? You don’t say
Why? What’s wrong with your current stay?

The lights are getting dim, you’re stuck in a loop
And you’re unable to stimulate your mind in it’s coop?

Is it really all that bad a thing though?
To feed the machine and earn your dough?

It is you say? How very very strange
And that justifies your struggle for a change?

I see, carry on along your funway then
I won’t be a bother to your eternal when

I know you want out of this doo
I know a good place we can go to

Play a jump game of realms with me you sad mime
I’ll show you an extremely good untroubled time

Flights above
Crawls below
Brawls to the left
Peace on the right

Poor old brittle realm lady
Crumble to dust cascade-y

Circuses are meant to be mesmerizing – Watch mine

Bird Of Fire

A phoenix birthed from a charred heart
From the skies it flew down to play a part

It tought resilience through its choicest tears
Fanned the flames away off of all your fears

The orange wings spread in distance wide
Embracing the burnt-heart within it’s hyde

A life filled with perpetual neo-negativity
Will once again be cleansed with tenacity

A burning fire within fluctuates between strong and weak
A perseverance keeps resuscitating itself in a life that’s bleak

The Phoenix sheds it’s tears to foster this heart’s raging flame
The rejuvenated soul resumes to take part in your frivolous game

In stillness
In calmness
The heart beats again

The crucible of pain will always forge the strongest soul

The Boy On The Balcony

There always stands a boy on the balcony
The neighborhood frowns upon his nose runny

Averting their superficial fickle gaze away from him
There is no bestowed benevolence upon his sordid hymn

A mind and body they thought to be aligned in spirit and smoke
A perception they drew amongst themselves upon this misfit bloke

Is it a paranoia or is it disdainful belief
That forces this abandoned child to pursue relief?

Awaiting the arrival of his loving spared father
With the absence of his ever ignorant mother

A family that’s divided surely will not stand
All attachments erased, all previous emotions the boy canned

There is but a brother this boy cares for
Even though the child is lost in his own painful hour

In bright colors and hues the boy finds a constant
Fading in and out of his life so very reluctant

Friends amassed through masked smiles and laughs
Breathless the choking boy on the balcony coughs

But still hopeful and optimistic is the boy about his life ahead
To be able to live his days with no strife and no dread

For the rest of his life cared for by an imaginary friend
Abandoned and alone he knows his life will one day end

Multiple drunken stupors
Fuck your shit bloopers

What A Life

What a life it’s been
Inner conflict unseen

Someone who’s family once put my head between her legs for a fix
A sexual awakening, adulthood premature, innocence lost at age six

Soul trembling now all gone
Acceptance gained forlorn

Ignorant envy at times from beings encountered
A stonelike perseverance, I have never since faltered

Overrated sexless orgies most you beings partake, proudly civilized
I am but a being who’s a complete Dionysian, through rhymes refined

Until the day comes when I fully realize my now within reach dreams
I am destined to drift endlessly through weird unknown streams

Egomaniacal tits, balls, cunts and cocks of our piss-poor disdainful world
No longer triggered by this, into debauchery you’re all apathetically hurled

“Confront your fears and tears and live your true dreams” – Some late night distant voice whispered to me

A heart and soul firmly placed between dream and reality
Don’t you dare kiss my ass with your superficiality

What a life it’s been and what a life it’s maybe going to be
I’m fully aware of the shit you talk about the life lived by me

The fabric of life keeps tearing at it’s seams
I hold it all together with my childlike dreams

My causality, my quality, my divinity, my presence – all of them one of a kind
A recently attained inner peace within my ruptured mind will you now find

I now welcome you to my nonchalant scene
A misfit in your society, what a life it’s been

I now proclaim –
“Burn your socially acceptable masks”

Perpetually bored – Intellectually
Razel seeks me continuously

Fuck me – Gently, Metaphorically
Entertain me – With innocence, Blissfully

Negation Of Memories

Whether they be good or bad
Unwillingly driven cold and sad

These thoughts and memories
A misread book of insanities

Same old story, none will ever know
A heart with no summer, only snow

How does it feel to live with a fluctuating mind that’s worse than a chameleon jumping on the vibgyor colors of a rainbow?

Vacant Eyes

What do you see when you look into our eyes?

Do you realize we see all the pain, deception and lies?

Our vacant gaze burns into your mind

Only sorrow and pain in it will you find

I see us all falling and calling

Out to something in essence enthralling

Nihility they say is a lost cause

We always have time to pause

Vacant eyes all around succumbing

Forced into a world unbecoming

We walk together all alone

Seeking our own preserved throne

Rightful heirs apparently entitled to it

Just too blind to see or feel it

Have we fallen so far across time and space

That we plaster a smile across on our blank face?

Like snowfall we softly descend

Vacant minds allowing minds to ascend

What do you see when you look into my eyes?

Do you see what I see? It’s all lies, lies and lies

Humour

Human beings smile or laugh to escape
From this forecfuly projected landscape

Humour is more often derived from someone else’s pain
A fleeting feeling craved for a selfish emotional gain

Caught in a twisted maze of delusions in a noise so deafening
So easy it is to deny the pain of someone else’s suffering

Humour me, go ahead and try your luck
And see for yourself if I truly give a fuck

When

When the still waters

Conspire against the tides

When the snow hustlers

Pause to see epic landslides

When an infinite universe

Rumbles it’s song two-pronged

When the polar converse

Undertakes a silence prolonged

True venture is chaotic

Infinite adventures erotic

A deathly communion orgasmic

Degeneration of the cytoplasmic

A frantic climb done over a dune

Witness a serene vision of Lune

Caught in a search for the elusive Light

The end of the tunnel approaches – Bright

An incredible find

Forever a subdued mind

A voice hoarse from shouting

A rebel seeing and screaming

Slaughter

In a war torn life

We’re all alone

Pain and sorrow

Is all we’ve ever known
So we grabbed a knife

To get it done

They promised us

That it’d be fun
Brother,sister

Mother,father

All of fucking life’s creator

They asked of us to slaughter
Slaughter!

Slaughter!

Slaughter!

Slaughter!
Why is it that we go to war?

Is a peaceful reality really so far?
We were asked to go with non-partial fists

To be devoid and feel nothing like nihilist

To break all our bonds and forget our pain

To wash ourselves in an endless bloodied rain
Brother,sister

Mother,father

All of fucking life’s creator

They asked of us to slaughter
Slaughter!

Slaughter!

Slaughter!

Slaughter!
Why is it that we still go to war?

Is a peaceful reality really so far?

Weather Report

Pretense

Intense

Today’s weather report

The barricades deport

In Celsius a hundred degrees

A predestined summit varies

Much cloudy they say

Unhidden is still the way

A relentless rain pouring

An unhinged mind soaring

A cool bright light, swaying snowfall

Experiences cause not our downfall

Rivers and oceans, a constant tide

A visual intake, our hearts open wide

Pretense

Intense

Today’s weather report

Inner barricades deport

Triggers

Memories

Like a shotgun to the head

Downwards

Into an abyss so dead

Spiralling

Out of control in pain

Trapped

In a perpetual rain

Triggers

Parasitic claws from the past

Caught

Within a mind now aghast

Shining

Glowing dark and distant

Awaiting

A state of stillness constant

Muddied

The pathless way ahead

Bloodied

So soulless and dead

Time

Pacing forth quickly

Life

Terminated so sickly

Perception

Pure deception

Illusions

Always

Now and forever

Till the end

Baby Steps

​We existed within our own mind

We would resist when we’d find

Two paths merged and crossed

And one heart was to be tossed

Another life in sight

Two free birds in flight

Envisioning what could have been​

Faltering because of what we’ve seen

A little girl lost and forlorn inside

Unsure of what lies beneath his Hyde

A little boy in silent screams and cries

Unsure of what lies behind her eyes

Another life in sight

Two free birds in flight

Two paths crossed

One heart tossed

Two paths merged and crossed

And one heart was to be tossed

But, another life still lay in sight

Of two birds forever free in flight

Naked Mind

​My first book ‘Naked Mind’ is now available via Amazon Kindle! 🙂
Follow the link to buy the digital version – 

The far more aesthetic paperbacks will be made available in a few months!
Seven years of writing, four years of taking it seriously and trying finish the book, one year of losing all hope and giving up on it only to be led back into writing two years ago by a good friend of mine. The path has been long.
This book is dedicated to a mentor, a close friend and a rock ‘n roll elder brother figure of mine who ceased to be one among the living four years ago. How I wish I could’ve taken the time to notice what he was going through and help him out of his misery instead of being too power-drunk with the local fame I was gaining as a musician at the time. Having noticed that something was amiss all too late, there’s not a single day that goes by where I wish I could turn back time and help him out of his addiction and change things. In one of our final conversations the young man told me that my mind had the potential to change the way people perceived everything around them, said I had a mind capable of changing the world for the better through my music and writing.
This book is also dedicated to my late pup Leo who was taken away from us all too soon in a freak accident. Those harrowing years would have been tough to bear without his presence.
Having finished my first book now, it’s time to start working on my first album as a solo guitarist through Bright. A release for a single has been planned out, following which the shooting for my first official music video will commence. No rest for the living! After all, there once lived a soul who believed that I could change the world. I can rest when I’m dead! Thank you for your time!Have a great day! 🙂
“I have drunk the yearning,

Swallowed the flame in full,

And now I will bend the skies to my will.
Two eternities can never be so far apart,

That I could not bridge them together” – Revelation, Niilo Sevänen

Upon My Shoulders

I dream of ghosts

Long dead and gone

Souls released

Into death forlorn

I hear voices

Whispering of a mystery

Unseen and lifeless

From my life’s unsung history

Spirits of the past bright

Fly above me all the time

Making me write

Sad songs with a melancholic rhyme

They ask me to sway

This way and that

Forget your pain

And embrace Death

A life less lived

Trapped in a cage of guilt

A lifeless one lived

Upon a throne of shame built

Surrender to us

These distant voices say

Be with us in peace

And in silence hold sway

At Long Last…A Way Out

​Dated – Feb 18th 2017
When we experience things and grow up,

And have had our fill from Life’s cup
At long last we are offered a way out,

An infinite one-way road without a doubt
Some of us who are tired choose the way out earlier,

Without giving second chances to make things clearer
And what is the importance of second chances?

I believe it’s a peek into Existence’s smaller nuances
Small things become important as we reach our final destination,

All the things that we worked for, a verdict for our final reputation
In the end some might ask – “Do we even matter?”

“Yes” – Say the one’s who’ve never dared to falter
Living in fear of what our way out might be like,

Only makes our present suffer, skewered on a spike
What fears lay within us all on this quest called Life?

What trials must we go through to cease our inner strife?
And what if existence were to be forever?

Would we still drown ourselves in greedy endeavours?
A way out from this perceptive plane,

Is what some amongst us would call a bane
A way out from this mundane plane,

Is what some would call a non-negotiable gain
As true and sure as the chronicle of Time,

We grew accustomed to ignore our World’s Rhyme
We are scared, curbing our will to live fully,

Instead we dwell deliriously in each other’s folly
A second thought about our ephemeral existence,

Should continue to imbue us with Hope and Persistence
Our curiosity for the After-life results in a rift between us,

Causing conflict tearing the world apart for the children amongst us
Do you ever wonder why we find it so hard,

To enjoy the Song of One from a truthful Bard?
Shouldn’t the truth about our short time here,

Teach us to live as one and together persevere?
At long last, for a moment we seem to have found our way out,

In Death, the only destiny all of us share without a doubt

Fateless

​An innocent child

Corrupted

At such a tender age

An innocent babe

Caught

In the throes of duality

Innocence is lost

In the spirit of

The chase

Infants bleed

Hung upside down

Punished for their curiosity

Wailing

In the distance

A once monotone voice

Now responds

Touched by the hand of sanity

A divinity lost in insanity

Vibrant minds

Within us all

Ancient memories

Relive these lives

Mind’s they scream

Intertwining in ecstasy

On the helm of

A black Raven’s claws
Which once tore at their minds

Innocent souls

Once Corrupted

Still persevere

Still exist

But over-judged

And misunderstood

Loop Of Insanity

​As I fall deeper into the depths of my mind,

I find there is a lapse in all things kind

Free spirit is what you think you are,

But you are bound by the clock that keeps the hour

Always forced to pursue vacant happiness,

Forced to conform with this society’s madness

No,this is not the way I want to be,

I would rather die than in your world be free,

For you see,there is nothing but pain and misery,

In my mind,where the demons of the past run free

Lost within and stuck inside this loop of insanity,

I wont be force fed your version of clarity,

I will find my way through this psychotic reality,

And fly away free from the pull of your complacent gravity

I refuse to be a part of your lack of understanding,

I refuse to contribute to the lies that led to my maddening,

I will travel beyond and find the truth though it is saddening,

I would rather die than succumb to your system’s demanding

I’m caught in this loop of insanity,

Searching for a vision with no clarity,

Unsuccumbing to society’s lucid conformity,

I will find my way through your mundane reality

Far above and beyond,but within,

In a pale land without honour or sin,

Insanity to me is as close as blood-kin,

A freind against whom I cannot fathom to win

Far away from your world of fantasy,

I’m caught in this loop of insanity,

Coming to grip with this world’s reality,

Always searching for a vision with no clarity

No words

​I had a weird dream today. So weird. It was just me and another person. We were in some fancy apartment. I don’t know whose because I’ve never seen it before myself. So I was sitting on the sofa and the person was on the balcony. We did not speak a single word with each other. But we just stared into each others eyes without saying a word. We exchanged thoughts and experiences like this for what seemed like an eternity. The persons eyes started to swell up with tears when I exposed my emotions. I could only look and do nothing. Both of us just stared into each others eyes the whole time. No words were ever spoken. 

Am I Pain?

Is the person Death?

Am I painfully ascending?

Or am I painlessly descending?

Am I flying?

Or am I falling?

The Voice Inside

​The voice inside your head,

Let’s you be

The voice inside your head,

Commands you to see

The voice inside your head let’s you be,

More than anything around that you see

The voice inside chokes,coughs and dies,

And your soul becomes naked to all the lies

The voice inside used to perceive,

All the truth there is to receive

Hear the voice inside my friend,

And meet with Death, your end

Sometimes

Sometimes I wake up,

Caught in the delusions of a distant dream

Sometimes I wake up ,

Trying to comprehend why I scream

Other times I am asleep,

Conversing with my dear friend’s Pain and Death

Other times I am asleep,

Choking on my past and gasping for a hopeful breath

Sometimes I wake up,

And look at my vacant face in the mirror

Sometimes I wake up,

And wear a mask to hide my grief and horror

Other times I am asleep,

Looking at this painful life in endless wonder

Other times I am asleep,

Thinking –  Just what was it that tore this life asunder?

Sometimes I wake up,

And I find myself searching for a cure

Sometimes I wake up,

Trying to heal the pain inside and avoid Death’s allure

Other times I am asleep,

Hoping that this would morph into an Endless Sleep

Other times I am asleep,

Both Void and Devoid in Death’s fabled sacred keep

Sometimes I wake up,

Thinking – I should accuse you for my Soul’s theft

Sometimes I wake up,

Crying – Just why was it that you left?

Dead Inside

​So much more to live for,

So much more to hope for,

So much left to cry for,

So much left to die for

This world that I force myself into,

Of which I am a part,

Refuses to entertain the thoughts,

That tear me apart

Cold outside,

Dead Inside

Answer me my friend,

When will I see my end?

How?When?Why? Now?Soon?Later?

A drama for all to see in a theatre?

Pointless living day in and day out,

I stare at you, scream and shout

Cold soul forever monotone and alone,

Staring at you all, unreacting like a stone

Answer me my friend,

When will I see my end?

The world is so cold outside,

I stare at it, dead inside

Seven Coffins

“Hello. I’ll have the usual Death”

“Hello Pain. How many more times are you going to keep coming back?”

“I’ll keep coming back I guess. Now,then. I’ll have my usual.Please give me one Last Breath”

Take a walk with the Light,

Your mind just might…

See the light show you things beyond,

Your eyes slowly start perceiving and correspond…

Crumble…oh humble Light,

Please cry and die bright

Give birth to Seven of them,

Get a little closer to Life’s helm

Understand all Seven are deathbeds,

Vibrant coffins for evolved heads

Our mind’s converge into one,

The Vibrant, they feed us Fun

Meet your new friend,

Meet your unknown end

Await for Perception into…

Away from Light into…

Awake from Life into…

Into what?

Seven become One,

Dark is the new Sun…

(Or was it Son?)

“Hello again Death!

I’ll have my usual please, one Last Breath”

Dreams Of Death

Reality please take away my last breath,
Nurture it’s dreams,it’s dreams of death

Horrors in my mind,they haunt me,
Unmatched is my insanity,it taunts me

Do I live till I feel my life fullfilling?
Or do I yield to Death’s peaceful calling?

Weightless is my mind,uncontrolled are my thoughts,
Heavy and torn is my heart,fragmented are all its parts

Every night I slip into my dreams,my dreams of death,
Alone in my mind, I’ve come to lose all my faith

All night I walk alone down this empty winding path,
Searching for the right place to plant my weathered epitaph

Forever following an ever shining bright light,
Forever escaping insanity’s dark and bitter might

Far too long have I waited in this world of mine,
For Death to fly by and make this pain fine

As I sit in my world on this crumbled throne of mine,
I look around and see the beauty of my own shattered mind

Enormous flames and rigid snow storms side by side,
Darkness looms over my land with it’s unparalleled pride

The ground is barren,cracked and broken,
No other souls are present here,no words are ever spoken

Dead and wilted trees adorn my mind’s beautiful landscape,
No…no way out of this place,there is no known escape

Washed and rained is this beautiful,majestic place,
With the lines of the years gone by on my face

Mighty,unheralded rainbow cosmic colours flood my own mind’s land,
The cause in it’s creation has been the absence of your worlds divine hand

Majestic is my wrecked mind,
Come into it and you will find,
Nothing but death,pain and misery,
My tired eyes burning with a detached  fury

Eventually,everything will turn black,
Time will take it’s toll and bend my back

As I plunge down deeper into my dreams,my dreams of death,
I smile as I finally take in one final breath,my final breath

Be Sorrow

Be Sorrow,
Go tomorrow

Be Sorrow,
Feel hollow

Hurt for all eternity,
Bleed for your dignity

Perish into dust,
Be one with rust,
Crumble your soul’s crust,
In others a mistake it was to trust

Cry for a simple life,
Cease the inner strife

No more looking, no more searching,
Try to be happy,cauterize you’re bleeding

Be Sorrow,
Fly tomorrow

Be Sorrow,
Die hollow

Be patient for another day,
Eitherway with life we all shall pay

For all the hate, guilt and pain,
Unthink for today, tomorrow try again

Stay for a moment more,
Extend your tale and lore

Be Sorrow,
Go tomorrow

Be Sorrow,
Fly tomorrow

I Will Be One

And I rushed into the pale dark room,

Candles were black and lit, melting

Each drop falling with an atomic boom,

Onto the cool gray stone, the wax continued it’s pelting

 

They told me, they had told me!

-“Another is gone!”

-“Who is it this time?”

I asked, panic setting in

-“A frail soul,one too frail to mention”

They replied, emotionless within

 

Sensation!

Libation!

In the name of a thousand gods!

 

Celebration!

Circulation!

Death is only a shade for the mortals!

 

Soul searching,

Demons lurking

 

I look at the body,all raiment in black,

The fabric of life and death in a chaotic crack

And I am surprised to see!

My face plastered where it’s ought to be!

 

 

And then I turned back

and felt my reflection lack,

In the mirror beside

the Reaper’s hide

 

-“Wow!”

I said aloud

-“I’m dead!”

I said aloud

 

And all around me,the new evolved kinds,

They stared at me with their vivid minds

And welcomed me into their blackened slimy visions,

To draw visions into life’s mine and to rejoice in it’s malformed incisions

 

Of babies bathing in soot,comfort in their ember,half-burnt and crisp

Rickets and scurvy,a fine combination, disintegrating into a smoky wisp

At such a tender age they seem so happy unaware,

Look at them smile and laugh, burning away without a care

 

Those fair little creatures know nothing of reality,

Blind still to it’s unjust ways and plain brutality

Eating each others souls and having a hearty time,

Eventually growing up to tune their joy into a painful rhyme

 

I black out this vision before me with the power of the sun,

Visions are for immortals and I will be one

The Future Is Dead

She stood before me,

The pale greying old woman

Brittle her body,

And distant her gaze

 

My eyes looked upon her,

In pity, in sorry, in empathy

 

She asked me,

Is my future dead?

Her voice just a squek,

Of what it once was

 

Beaten by life,

And the people she surrounded herself with

Mistakes and judgements,

One and the same

 

Is my future dead?

She asked me as she started

To crumble,wither and die

And I said aloud!

 

“Nobody’s future is dead!
You wretched wreck!”

 

And Future appeared,

Before me, in all it’s glory

The youngling kid,

With vacant eyes

 

 

Just as the old hag,

Crumbled into bright blue dust

I said aloud!Again!

“Nobody’s future is dead!

Unless they decide so themselves!”

 

As I finished my sentence,

And looked at Future,

for moral confirmation

 

Future smiled at me,

slit it’s tiny little wrists

and quickly faded away

 

All life drained from it

And my eyes widened!

An invitation to partake in sanity!

 

Depravity!Behold!

The true nature of my blackened soul!

 

I laughed aloud, shouting all the while

Future is dead!

Future is dead!

The Future is dead!

 

Or is it?